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Monday 30 October 2017

285- Projects around men and mh



Discussing mental health, stigma and related subjects with my wife, over breakfast this morning reminded me additional reasons why I'm so passionate in blogging about mental health : I'm a non-binary man, who don't man-up, who discusses openly my past experiences, and their lasting long-term effects on my mental and physical healths. 

We know that our society has many stigmas and prejudices to overcome. In fact, there are so many, that the tasks seem daunting. However, this doesn't mean that we have to give up on them, quite the contrary! 

Here's a quick breakdown of the discussion, in a bullet-form


  • Talking about health is quite taboo, still. Both physical and especially mental
  • These are both exacerbated in the French culture
  • I chatted with over 150 women, and can barely find 10 men with whom I had chats about mental health, in about 9-10 months of following twitter chats
  • I watched vlogs by many women on youtube, who talked about MH experiences and tips, and documenting mental health even when they don't suffer from a specific illness 
  • The few men I saw on YT haven't been as forthcoming, and tend to be loud and angry - results of stigma specifically directed at men who are told to man-up, to be viril and strong, and that to talk about our mental health means that we are weak 
  • I personally had many instances of people telling me that I was weak, either due to mental health, or lack of physical stamina/prowess, or because I am vegan, and "real men aren't vegan" (I won't quote the real words here, due to my carnophobia, I let you imagine what was said). 
  • Out of the 10 or so men I chatted or talked with about mental health, I keep int ouch with only 3 - the others either never reciprocated enough, or I didn't feel the will to reciprocate due to other reasons
  • I have had only a handful of open-hearted mental health discussions with men in my area. In general, the French culture, as I said above, and in other posts, propagates stigma, and prefers to instil the value that life is suffering, so we need to suck it up - not just men, mind you, but everyone. 
As a result of of all these factors and a few more, I decided on several projects, that my wife inspired, but we worded together : 

  1. Once #blogtober is over, I'll resume translating my blog into French - which has been on hold for 4 & half months. I want to be part of a societal change, if I can help bring it about
  2. I want to connect more often with the men in MH community, and expand on the few that I already chatted with. I'd love to skype and group-DM alike, to give a shape to the next projects, which are 
  3. Collaborative blog posts, and/or interviews with these men - both cisgender and non-binary/trans, and LGBTQ men, who face their own stigma on daily basis, even worse than "regular men" so to speak 
  4. Twitter chat specifically for us, these men, both those who suffer from mental illnesses, and those who don't - to build mutual support, allies and to stop the man-up tendencies of our societies. 
  5. I hope these can help all men to help other men to open up and talk about their own stories, and own mental health topics, and own experiences with mental illness/es. We need to create an avalanche, or ripples in society to bring about change and to fight stigmas
  6. Expand the topics we can talk about and help all of us, men, women, and everything in-between and around all non-binary LGBTQ people to talk about anything more openly, not just mental health, as we are more than the sum of our illnesses. 

    All this doesn't mean one bit that I'll stop talking with my women friends, nor will I stop being part of the overall mental health community. Quite the contrary, I want to focus on all aspects, and to be even a bigger part than I've been - all the whilst limiting my weekly twitter chats, to avoid burning-out my poor tired brain and to also, as said in project 6, I want us to talk about anything, even if we started and met in the MH community chats, to find mutual interests and expand our horizons by talking about hobbies, books, movies, art, in and around and outside of the topics of mental health. 

    So, men, are you ready for any of these projects ? 

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